Breathe

I'm finally home for good. Not going anywhere till next Tuesday=Gamelan training.

When I woke up today, I planned to go cycling. But The Mummy Returns went on HBO so I watched. Then ate. Then went online till now, it's 5.54=too late to go cycling. Sighh.

I knew it would suck to be home and have nothing to do. It did. I have to put up with the two maids, one naggy, the other lazy and watches porn secretly in the room. The good thing about being home is playing with my youngest sister and watching her grow up. She knows more words than the last time I talked to her. She is smarter than the last time I thought she was smart. & she made me realize how much I've missed ever since I started poly.

I remember when she was a baby. I didn't like her. I didn't like the fact that all the attention would soon go to her. I didn't like it that everything in the house changed. I hate change. But as she grew, I realized that her very presence made our family closer. So I promised myself that I wanted to be there for her in her growing years, to watch her grow. But I wasn't. I was too caught up with my life to care.

This holidays would be the chance to catch up with what I lost. & I hope it does.

When I got home yesterday, the way she hugged me and didn't want to let go, it made me realize so many things. What I failed to be. A good sister.

God, why am I crying.

Anyway, enough of the emoshit. I enjoyed the past few days with the people of my heart. There were too much smiles, laughters and jokes until I feel pain in my side after that. But it's still worth it. This is the people I've always missed. They're still the same people I love, and will always love. You guys are just too awesome! Much loves. :)

OMG, I miss my Canon. I've been feeling the emptiness since Monday, when I saw Syai's camera and when everyone kept asking where's my camera. The feeling is different from when I don't have my camera with me because I know it's at home. This one, my camera is in the "hospital", costing my parents a pretty $167. Cheaper than MY hospital bills, at least. Tuh. Empat ratus D, aku rindu kau! :(

I'm going to come up with a plan later. There's no way I'm going to spend the rest of the holidays in front of my laptop. I need to do something meaningful. Nights will of course consist of movies. Heh. Got loads in my hard disk. Been watching Glee with my tikus lately. A few more episodes to go and I'm done with Season 1. But will watch the White Castle thingy soon, Harold and Kumar is it? Forgot which I'm supposed to watch first. Uh-oh. Haha.

Hopefully, the pain will leave me alone. It's the chest pain that bothers me now. Sighh, when will this ever end?

Stay strong, Faz. :)

She wears G-string, I wear...... (forgot!)

HAHAHA.

Music starts playin’ like the end of a sad movie

It’s the kinda ending you don’t really wanna see

Cause it’s tragedy and it’ll only bring you down

Now I don’t know what to be without you around

P/S: I wanna watch Dear John, dammit. & Valentine's Day.