Hello hello kopi ke milo?!
I'm going off to KL tomorrow with my family, and Hippo and umm...cubs. HAHA. I pray for the journey to be a safe and smooth one. Amin. :)
Anyway, for whoever who still reads my blog at all, I'm sorry for not updating as frequent as I used to, or updating with emotional, sad stuff. It's just that the past month has been a rocky sea for me. I've been over-thinking, too much actually (I always do, anyway.) and it affected my feelings too badly. When I sent out that email, it brought me to tears. I didn't think that things would be reduced to this state. It took a lot of courage, but I don't regret it. Maybe someday, I'll find better courage to do something more than that. Other than that, I've been very sensitive this month. It's only January, and there were so many times my feelings got hurt, either intentionally or unintentionally. I don't really care, I shrug it off all the time, but usually, I suffer for just that moment. Sucks to be me, huh? But hey, I'm gonna be stronger this year. I won't let anybody bring me down this time. I've made mistakes and I learnt the lessons behind them. I won't repeat the same mistakes, that's for sure.
After the CNY weekend, it will be Week 14 of the academic calendar, which only means that it will soon be the end of Year 3 in RP. Well, not counting the UTs that come after the study week. Still, it's the end, finally the end of my life in RP, Insyallah. After that, I can finally pursue my dreams. Insyallah. Like my sis said, I am the fire starter of this dream of ours, she and Nafisah are the wood to keep that fire going. I honestly can't wait for that part of my life slash dream to start. :D
I'll be going to Graduation Night aka A Night To Remember on February 10 with a small group of friends, woohoo! Haz has been stressing over the dress but then decided to wear something she already owned. The same goes for me. The theme is 80s, what the heck am I supposed to wear? Haha, ohwells.
Sooooo, I've been hooked to this series called The Secret Circle the past week, thanks to Faleela who introduced it to me. I am addicted to it. I realize I have a thing for the spooks. Like umm, vampires, witches and demonic shows. The Secret Circle is about witches, and is so DARK. But! Check this out.
Thomas Dekker
This guy is really sexy, lips-smacking, jaw-dropping, sexy in the show. He has that emo kid aura, especially with the eyeliner. Unless, it's not eyeliner and he really originally has thick lashes. Sexy, seriously, I swear. Okay, dah.
I guess I'm just in a good mood today to be posting about so much things. Well, I guess my blog is just an outlet for my feelings. It's really been a while since I posted this much about what's happening in my life. Oh! I should mention that Ummi Aisyah came by last night. She arrived in Singapore on Monday for just a week. But still, she was willing to come to my house at 12 midnight, so what does that mean? Heh heh. Anyway, I listened to Ummi Aisyah and Fidtriah talk about Ummi Wahidah and all the things she did to the entire family. I really, really hope Ummi Wahidah comes to her senses. Sigh.
Okay then, till here. I still haven't packed for tomorrow's trip and we're departing in the morning. HAHA. Anyway, I stumbled upon something that pretty much sums up how I feel about Ahmad. :3
"When I’ve been distressed, or hurt, or disappointed in my friends and in myself, you have stayed on the line to comfort me. You’re never afraid of silences. When I hang up you wait a minute and call right back, without a word of resentment or criticism, just quiet understanding. It’s as if you can sense what I’m feeling and you know just when to call. The most extraordinary thing about you is that as much as I push you away in my spells of anger or distress, you’ll stay right there, unmoving. You’re so stubbornly devoted to me that I wish every day that I had the same patience, wisdom and integrity as you. Never a single grudge have you held. Not once. Not ever. I know I haven’t been easy, but you always help me come round. Sometimes I fear I have little to give you in return for your enduring kindness and love. I can be cold, distant, reactive. I know that you find my conflicted nature challenging, but you never give up on me, even long after I’ve decided to give up on myself. With gentle, firm words you tell me to snap out of it. That’s all I ever needed. Thank you. I don’t know what else to say."
Thank you, Ahmad Mustaqim, for your endless patience with me. I've always admired you for it. :3
One day when the sky is falling
I'll be standing right next to you
Right next to you
