Crawl

I think that it's unfair that Ahmad shared his side of our love story but I didn't. So I'm gonna share my side of the story from day 1 since he wanted to know so badly. Hahaha.

It's true that we've had many ups and downs the past 6 months. & I think I'm the one who gave him the most shit and yet, he puts up with it with so much patience and maturity. I think that my time with him has made me a better person than I was before. I've learnt so much from him and I'm really thankful that I have him.

It has been a long journey since the day we first met. Sooo, bear with me. :)

I didn't really notice you when I first entered W35F. Ouch, I know, sorry. Haha. We didn't really talk much, you gave me the impression that you were a very shy guy. Being very quiet in class and all. But that was fine with me. So this continued until E-learning week. Somehow, chatting on MSN with you, and mass convo-ing with the rest of the peeps, and you teasing me, made me have that teeny weeny itsy bitsy crush on you. I'm not sure how it happened, but it happened pretty fast, so fast that whenever I get an MSN alert from you, my heart races crazily. Even the rest of the melayus teased us, and crazily, madly, weirdly enough, I sorta liked it. Haha, okay shut up. E-learning was over too soon, and yes, we went back to the way we were before. I actually found myself missing the E-learning days because in school, on MSN, I didn't really know what to say to you, and you didn't seem to respond too well either. It was awkward.

6th July was the day we all returned to school. The day after, Zul and Syai placed on my MSN note: 'Ahmad, oh i miss you'. -.- _l_ Thanks ah, guys. I knew you saw it, my sister saw it too. She thought I really wrote that, and she thought I was crazy. Haha. I panicked. Like, crazy panic. So yeah. & 8th July, was the day Mirah, Sarah and me confessed to each other on who we had a crush on in class. I told them I didn't want to take it seriously, that it's just a crush, and nothing would come out of it. Then the next day, Sarah and me read a post on your blog about how you were still trying to get over your ex. I knew then that I really didn't have a chance so I decided to forget about it.

Unfortunately, I found myself falling deeper. Whenever we were not in the same team, I would find myself watching you, what you were doing and stuff. Sarah even caught me watching you secretly. When you and I do end up in the same team, I tried not to watch you, tried to act casual, tried to be myself. But everyday, you come and go, nothing was going to make us more than friends so I didn't hope for anything. It's just a crush. I'll get over it.

If I’m not mistaken, it was on the 27th of July that our darling, dearest, wonderful Syaiful Amiril bin Haj Mohamad asked me a question I least expected him to ask, 'Kalau dalam dunia ni, takde laki lain except for ahmud and zul, yang mane kau pilih?' It took me by surprise. Well, actually, I laughed. HAHA. Without even thinking about it, I answered, 'Ahmad.' He asked why. So I said it's because you're quiet, you're not like other guys I know, you go for Friday prayers... to which Syai argued that who knows, you went somewhere else, nak step gi solat je. I went, 'Whatever. & he doesn't smoke.' Syai argued again that maybe you do smoke but just didn't show it. Whatever, I know.

So after playing blind mice after school the day before Sarah's birthday, you walked home with us for the first time. Mirah and me walked in front while you walked behind us with Zul, Azhar and Syai. I was just talking with Mirah when suddenly, our dearest Syai yelled,

"SITI, SITI !! TENGOK ! AHMAD ROKOK !!"

Honestly, the first thought in my mind was, SHIT, fuck you, Syai. You were laughing, and you handed the cig back to Syai, and Syai was bloody excited and he even pointed at the cig. Then, he went, "I'll ask you that question again tonight, Siti. *kening naik-naik*" IN FRONT OF YOU! So that night, Syai interrogated me further. 'How do you feel now that you know Ahmad smokes?' & he figured out on his own that I liked you. Tsk.

It was on Sarah's birthday that you first sent me your lame, lame, lame text message. 'Hi guys, Ahmad here. I don't think you have my number so here it is. (insertsmileyfacehere)'. I knew it was Syai's idea because before that, he asked me if I wanted a surprise that night. & obviously you were that surprise. I was angry, mad, furious. I didn't like it that Syai forced you to do it. I didn't want you to do something you didn't want to do. I asked Sarah if she received a message from you and she said she didn’t. Too obvious already. So I calmed down, and realised that it wasn’t your fault.

The next day, you texted me. The day after, you texted again. And again, and again, and again. With each conversation we had, I fell deeper for you and I knew I couldn’t run away from my feelings. Each time you texted, without me even prompting you, my hopes rise a little more higher. Syai made it even more obvious with his constant interrogation. I even got scolded by him. Tsk.

& so, 7th August 2009 (070809, nice number, eh?), the start of something new.

(Goddammit, what a freaking long post.)

Well, I have SYAIFUL AMIRIL BIN HAJ MOHAMAD & MAISARAH BTE KAMAL to thank for all this. Syai, it's true: tak sia-sia kene campak botol. ;)

But Msarah! Walao eh you. I still can't get over the fact that you said: 'ahmud, she really likes you. don't break her heart, kay?' Whaaaaaat the hellllll were you thinking? Okay la, it's not your fault. You were clueless. Even I laughed when I read the convo; the way you panicked was so cute. But it shows you care, so... thank you for making the confession for me. *winkwink*

Now, I'm done. I'm surprised I still remember the details so clearly. Macam baru semalam je orang tu kene marah. Haha.

I think this is enough for today. Hope YOU like it. Since you wanted to know so much. I think everyone knew that somehow, we would end up together. & Syai decided to make it happen. May Allah bless that guy.

&. The past week has been awesome. 8 Feb to 12 Feb. Even though it was UT week. I even met your nenek for the first time. Heh. Beat that, baby!

If we crawl

Till we can walk again

Then we'll run

Until we're strong enough to jump

Then we'll fly

Until there is no wind

So let's crawl, crawl, crawl

Back to love, yeah

Back to love, yeah