13 Reasons Why
Clay and Hannah
This song from this scene has been on repeat since I binge watched this series on Netflix. Truly heartbreaking, this one is. I cried like a baby. So relatable. :(
Salam!
It has clearly been a rough start of the year for me. I know the last time I posted, I mentioned positivity at my new workplace. Well, I could never be more wrong. I said it too soon, I guess. Barely 6 months with Shaws, and I'm jobless now. Not because I was fired, but because I resigned, for so many reasons. But the most important reason is the management and leadership in the company. Throughout my time with them, I saw and experienced things that I could never possibly imagine to happen in PCF. There was zero professionalism, zero integrity and zero honesty in this company's management system. And by that, I mean the people. In my last post, when I said positivity in my new workplace, I think I meant my colleagues. They're all good people, and they believe in helping each other. Which I now feel is so important in order to battle the tyranny that is the leader.
I'm sorry, I'm just letting out my hard feelings about this company. I can't say I regret joining Shaws because it has made me learn so much about myself; what kind of person I want to be in a workplace. What kind of leader I don't want to be, if the opportunity ever opens up to me. How important teamwork and moral support is in a team. Back in PCF, I had a really, really good support system and leadership. Comparing that to this at Shaws, well, the difference is vast when it comes to the leadership component. Unfortunately, the support system isn't strong enough to fight back against the leader. Probably the only way is to leave if you can't take it anymore.
Right after I gave my resignation, it's like Allah was showing me even more reasons why this place wasn't good for me because of all the things that happened right after. One after another, the events that happened not just to me but to the other teachers too. Plus, more evidence as to why the leadership is lousy and unprofessional.
Nevertheless, I found good friends here. We provided the support we needed to each other and grew closer eventually. They were sad to see me go, of course. On my last day, we were all in a group hug and it was all I could do to fight back the tears. I didn't really feel as much loss as I felt for PCF, but I definitely felt something for these teacher friends I made. We have a lot of plans to meet up again so I'll be seeing them again.
I am not exactly jobless though. I searched for other teaching positions during my notice period and managed to get one with a direct bus route to and back. Singaporean company, of course. I've had enough working with expats and in-betweens to last me a while. Hopefully, this company will play nice. Praying hard because I really don't want to keep job hopping. I need the income because face it, this is Singapore.
I chose the picture above because this is one series that is very raw and real. I don't quite know how to explain it. The series touched on many teenage issues like bullying, slut shaming, rape and most importantly, suicide. These are still happening everywhere and it's horrible. There are so many lessons to take away from this show. I read the comments online and people were saying things like how the show was glorifying suicide. But that's not the point of the show! Some people are so annoying. Watch it for yourself and keep an open mind.
The lesson I learnt from this show? Speak up. If you're facing trouble, talk to someone about it. There will always be someone there for you. Be kind to people. You don't know what they may be going through.
Shaws needs to watch this show. Naw, they're too busy with their own personal agendas to bother. But now, I'm free from them and I couldn't be happier. I just hope my friends in there have the strength to pull through to the end of the year.
Okay, that's it! I better stop hahaha. Look at the time! I start my new job on the 2nd of May. So, I have 2 days of break left and I have housework to do tomorrow (Sunday). So I better go.
Hope life isn't too cruel to you (if I still have readers). I know I had a rough start but I'm hopeful that it'll all get better. One bad egg in the basket doesn't make all the others bad too. I've got to keep searching and have faith that there are still good people in the world.
Be safe and in the best of health! Salam!
When the night was full of terrors
And your eyes were filled with tears
When you had not touched me yet
Oh, take me back to the night we met
I had all and then most of you
Some and now none of you
Take me back to the night we met
I don't know what I'm supposed to do
Haunted by the ghost of you
Take me back to the night we met
